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Seek Only the Barriers to Love


A member in the audience of a talk philosopher J. Krishnamurti was giving in 1964 asked a question, “Why do we love our mothers so much?” To which J. Krishnamurti responded with, “Do you love your mother if you hate your father? When you love somebody very much, do you exclude others from that love? If you really love your mother, don’t you also love your father, your aunt, your neighbor? Don’t  you have the feeling of love first, then the love of someone in particular? Can you be considerate of your mother if you are not being considerate of also another? Otherwise, you don’t really love your mother, it is just a word, a convenience.”

Another mentor I have in my life often says, ”Teach only love, because that is who you really are. Everything else is false, or the ego, or based in fear.” If you think about it, everyone is a teacher. Every single one of us. From little babies to the elderly, there is not a single person who doesn’t teach. Teaching doesn’t just happen in the classroom. It happens all the time and everywhere. You teach by being who you are. When you love, you teach love. When you are afraid, you teach fear. If we focus or obsess with a limited thinking mind then we get more and more self-limiting and limited experiences. The reverse is also true. When we give our attention to loving thoughts, we heal, love grows and the evidence is unmistakably found in our circumstances and relationships. If you are love, you teach love. This REAL love, is who you really are. It’s that simple.

Our past life and experiences have taught us to be fearful, careful and wary. A newborn baby is afraid of nothing and no one. We couldn’t say the same for ourselves. We are laden with baggage and quite easily triggered and found recounting past pain.

A Course in Miracles says, “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” Only look for what is blocking you from being the love that you are. Only seek the barriers, because you already are love, nothing is lost. You are merely coming home.

“No one can teach you how to love. If people could be taught how to love, the world problem would be very simple. Like math, to learn a formula, set an algorithm and expect perfectly predictable answers. No such thing. What a world we could create then. There would be no hate. If there was a love formula, we could end war, disease, exploitation and we could all be really friendly with each other. But love is not so easy to come by, as we can see in the world today. It is easy to hate. You cannot teach anyone to love, but one can notice the hate and put it aside. By doing so one can see the love once again”, J. Krishnamurti during a Q&A session in 1964.

You cannot seek love, or pursue love. You can pursue sensation, touch, desires. Love must be allowed, it will naturally come to mind because that’s your original state of being. There is nothing to do other than to seek out the barriers to the love that you already are. When you discover that love, there is no division, there is no “more than”, “lesser than”, there is no reserved love, particular love, it is just simply love.

This is the truth that you must know if you want to find true happiness. Do not seek love, seek only the barriers to love.



  1. Jillian Tullett says:

    Extremely powerful and so relevant not only to our own individual lives, relevant to all that is going on around us.
    It is time for introspection (a reflective looking inward) and Renewal. Thanks for sharing Richa.

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